To not get boring.

Chuck Pahlanuik once wrote that one must never ever get boring. God only watches you and kills you when you get too boring. 

You could say, that in the past, I have coolly forgotten those words and tried every trick in the trade to become boring. 

Somehow though, I have remained unsuccessful managing instead, to develop that penchant for drama that makes my life just be... not-so-boring.

Buy how do I achieve that? I just do things till I land myself into situations that bring enough anguish to fill out a man's heart. Anguish, as any sad song writer can tell you, makes for some lovely drama and is just SUPER Not-so-boring. And then all that work required to come out of the anguish. 

It makes for a good story. 

Anyway, It's time to work for that excitement again, because belatedly,  I have realized if I remain boring any longer God will finally decide to follow what Chuck Pahlanuik said. 

But this time perhaps excitement needs to be a positive element. Let's leave the anguish to the sad song writers. I am a family man after all and familiarity is more my ploy. 

And yet, I have always been a writer who lived and loved morosely. 

How them do I suddenly write a happy story and that too an exciting one?

Maybe the answer is simple.

I write...One word at a time. 

there's a finality when you write something and put it.

I'm hoping its this finality that is going to stop me from taking another drag. I cannot smoke any more. Should not. Will not. 

The question is what do I do with the ample time I have suddenly at my disposal?

it's been hardly an hour

And I am already missing taking in a drag. But this time I have to quit for ever. For the child that I have and to ensure I am available to give him a full life that he deserves. 

The title doesn't matter. And will change when it does.

I am 38 years old. I have spend much of this in casual disregard of my health. 

Over the last three years I have become obese and heavy, puffing cigarettes while sitting lethargically, with not an ounce of exercise. 

Over the last few months, I have developed the start of a congenital heart disease although the doctor dismisses it saying that only a 12 year old boy would have completely clear arteries. I think he is wrong. Another doctor said what I have is minimal but cannot be ignored. 

And lately I have been having chest pains, although the tests ruled out anything significant, I am unable to ignore it any further. 

Hence without further ado, I now smoke my very last cigarette. 

With this, I am done.